Another Heartwrenching Loss

I cried during the 10th inning yesterday. Because that inning was the straw that broke the camel's back. Last night was a game that we should have, could have, needed to win. And with 7 solid innings from Curt Schilling, who left in line for his 15th win, it seemed that that was going to happen. The bullpen was only asked for two innings with one or less runs allowed. And since Papelbon was all but certain to pitch the ninth, and a scoreless ninth, the rest of the pen only needed to pitch one inning with one earned run. They couldn't handle it. Timlin put two guys on base without recording an out. Then Lopez put a guy on base without recording an out. Terry Francona then had no choice but to bring in Papelbon for two innings, starting with the bases loaded and nobody out. Papelbon did a tremendous job, allowing only a single inherited runner to score on a sac fly, and recording strikeouts for two of the three outs he made that inning. In the 9th, Paps gave up a run to tie the game, but I don't fault him at all. He deserved neither a blown save nor an earned run, because the run would never have scored had it not been for a passed ball by Mirabelli, allowing the runner on second to move to third and then score on a single.
But we failed to score any runs in the bottom of the 9th, despite loading the bases with one out, and Mr. Clutch coming up with a bizarre leadoff double. And then I saw Hansen warming in the pen.
I knew it was over.
I knew it as soon as they said his name.
I knew it as soon as he gave up a homer.
I knew it as I went to bed, disgusted, after he gave up another, 2-run homer.
We need Tek. We need Wake. We are going nowhere but down in the standings without them. Their impact on this team is enormous.
We are in danger of being swept by the Yankees. After all the hype about the series. After our team was so good the first half. I am absolutely humiliated by what has happened to our team.
And I think that the heartbreaking loss last night was more than just that. I saw our bullpen collapse like a deck of cards. Even with Rudy Seanez and Jason Johnson, who I consitered our two very worst pitchers, designated for assignment, we have no one. Schilling and Paps. But if no one can hold the lead between those two guys, we can't even win those games.
This is not a championship team. Not at all.